What can I say? With four kids the first day of school is always a whirlwind! This was the third year in a row that I had to leave before the kids left for school…so I didn’t get to do the Happy-Mother’s-Day!-the-kids-are-finally-gone happy dance.
Hmph.
But what a wonderful greeting when I got home from work! Backpacks and papers strewn all over the house, shoes flung haphazardly teetering upon the couch and coffee table, the kids playing video games and practically grunting their hello-mom-I-missed-you-so-much-today greeting as I walked in.
Yup, feel the love.
I gathered all the school papers; news, calendars, lists and noticed Tristan, my 1st grader, had the most papers and stuff in his backpack. It was astonishing how much stuff he came home with on his first day of school, and after I took out all that he had left in it from LAST YEAR, he didn’t actually have so much.
Just sayin’.
One of the papers Tristan brought home was titled Sneak & Share. Each kid is to bring in a special item from home to share in class, but the item is to be brought in a bag so the kids won’t be able to see it.
“So what’s something special that you want to bring in?” I asked.
He responded; “I want to share something I have with me always but it’s in my heart.”
“What’s that?” I asked
“God…”
I was in awe. I am so envious of that boldness. I love that he doesn’t have to worry about what kids think. In first grade they are accepting no matter what you look like, who your parents voted for, who your favorite football team is, or what you believe. He could be himself and share his heart without worry of ridicule.
My heart flew. Oh what a joy it is to know your child loves God and wants to share Him with others!
“…but what do I put in the bag?” He asked.
I suggested a little Bible and he turned his nose up, then I said maybe a cross or something else and Tristan’s eyes lit up. He ran over to a little popsicle cross he made at church a couple years ago that we had sitting on the thermostat on the wall.
He brought it over and plopped it in the bag with a huge grin on his face.
My heart could have burst I was so excited and proud of him. “So what are you going to say?” I asked, and he stood there for a moment the smile slowly falling from his face. He was silent for quite a while then he said,
“I don’t want to bring this. I want to bring a toy.”
My heart fell. “Why?” I asked puzzled.
Tears began streaming down Tristan’s cheeks as he struggled for a response.
“Why don’t you want to bring the cross?” I prodded gently.
Tristan began sobbing and through his distorted, tear stained face he said,
“Because they won’t understand.”
Boy, do I see myself in him.
How many times do I back down?
How many times have I missed an opportunity to share God with others because of that EXACT thought?
“for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” 2 Timothy 1:7
I have been in that exact position. In fact, I wrote about it in my post:
Origin of Species ~Charles Darwin
But what I learned from that experience is precisely what Jax told Tristan;
When we want to share Him with others, that’s God’s whisper…
“tell them about Me.”
When we second guess and begin to question, that’s the evil one suggesting…
“they won’t understand.”
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” John 14:27
What has God asked you to do but you still believe the evil one’s lies…
“They won’t understand!”
“You aren’t good enough!”
“You don’t know enough!”
“…do not worry about what to say or how to say it. At that time you will be given what to say, for it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.” Matthew 10:19-20 (niv)
Don’t wait another day!
God has given us the Good News, no…the BEST News! Stand up! Go out and share it!
What a moment of learning along with your boy Nicole! It’s always so eye-opening when God hands us these opportunities… ~ Blessings sister, Amy 🙂
So true Amy!! Man… God truly is amazing!!
Thanks Nicole for sharing Tristan’s story and reminding me how powerful God is – even bigger than all of my fears and misgivings!
Love You!
Love you back lady!! So much!! Oh, and by the way… Tristan did decide to take the cross. 🙂 Even though he said he was scared… Love it!! Praise God that He’s got our back!!!
Made me cry! Glad he took it! 🙂
Thanks, Julie, I’m glad he took it too!! In fact, the week he decided to take it, he came home one day and said he was talking to a boy about Jesus, and the boy already knew…which just gave him more confidence. And last week when he finally shared with the class, he said he wasn’t scared at all!!
God is so good!